what i'm watching: toon wisdom

I got home from work tonight and turned on the Sunday night cartoons, as I always do. We missed a bunch of "Family Guy"s and "American Dad"s last season, so many of the re-runs are new to me.

I just saw such a great clip, I had to run to Google to find the exact quote. I'll set the scene, which I'm sure most Family Guy aficionados will remember.

Peter has gone back in time and somehow altered the past. Lois is married to Quagmire and Peter is married to Molly Ringwald.

Peter is walking around with Brian, wondering how they can go back in time and put things back the way they were. For that, they need a visit from Death, a recurring character.

Here's the dialogue:
Peter: I don't care what it takes, Brian. I gotta get Lois back somehow.

Brian: Well, the only one who can help us is Death, and he only shows up when somebody dies.

Peter: Ah, that's gonna be tough. With President Gore's Universal Health Care, people are living much longer these days.

Brian: And with Zero Tolerance gun control and a strong, well-funded educational system, there's no street crime. Face it, Peter, you not marrying Lois was the best thing that ever happened to the world.

Peter: I don't care! We gotta find a way to summon Death, and quick!

(Jane Jetson falls out of the sky to the pavement, dead) [you're set up earlier for that]

Peter: Well, that might do it.

(Death appears)

Peter: Death, oh thank God you're here! Listen, you gotta send me back in time again, so I can marry Lois!

Death: Man, it's been a busy day. Dick Cheney, the chairman of Haliburton, shot Supreme Court Justice Scalia in a hunting accident, and the bullet went right through him and killed Karl Rove and Tucker Carlson.

Brian: Oh my God, Peter, you can't marry Lois!

[pause]

Peter: I don't know who any of those people are

I love this show!

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