my life in lyrics
Commentmeister, friend of wmtc, and - who knew? - lyricist Lone Primate made my morning with this:
Ha, you know, when I read the title of your posting, "life among the boxes", I was suddenly reminded of the Talking Heads song "Life During Wartime". If you look up the lyrics, they seem so appropriate to what you're about to do!In fact, I've thought of "Life During Wartime" several times in relation to our drive north this Tuesday. I have this image of us escaping to freedom. Hugely exaggerated, I know. We're not exactly smugglers on the Underground Railroad. But it's a neat thought, and these lyrics are amazing.
Of course, that doesn't stop us having a little fun with them... :)
Heard of a van that is loaded with boxes,
packed up and ready to go
Heard about Customs, out by the highway,
a place where nobody knows
The sound of yawning, off in the distance,
Guess I’ll get used to it now
Lived in New England, lived in the Boroughs,
I've lived all over this town...
Transmit the right forms to CIC now,
hope for an answer some day
They want our passports, to send us visas,
They sure as hell know my name
Here on the island, the trucks are loading,
everything's ready to roll
I blog in the daytime, I sleep in the nightime,
Next week I’ll have a new home...
Heard about Moncton? Heard about Windsor?
Heard about Surrey, B.C.?
You oughta know not to tell folks you’re going
somebody call you a creep
I got some groceries, some maple syrup,
to last a couple of days
But I ain't got no preachers, ain't got no Uzis,
ain't got no death row to slay
Why stay in New York? Why vote for Kerry?
Gonna be different this time...
Issues with winguts, they sure are stupid,
ReplyDeletethey bleat along with the crowd
We got a driveway, we've got a backyard,
We know that grilling's allowed
We dress like freepers, we dress like slackers,
or in some boots and a toque ...
Good luck with your drive up north. I was interested to read that you're going to Port Credit. I'm originally from Oakville (now in Atlanta) and have nothing but great things to say about that area.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy!
I see Redsock is also a lyricist. Very nice!
ReplyDeleteImcatl: Thank you! I love your blogging name. I always think it sounds like an ancient Mesoamerican god.
A-ha! Now that it's too late for you to get offended and back out, I can bring you the funniest thing to ever come out of Edmonton. It speaks for itself, really.
ReplyDeleteThree Dead Trolls in a Baggie’s
The Toronto Song (1989 Version)
I hate the Skydome
And the CN tower too
I hate Nathan Phillips Square
and the Ontario Zoo
The rent’s too high
The air’s unclean
The beaches are dirty
And the people are mean,
And the women are big
And the men are dumb
And the children are loopy
'cause they live in a slum
The water is polluted and the mayor’s a dork
They dress real bad and they think they're New York
In Toronto-
Ontario-o-oh...
(spoken)
A: You know...I think I pretty much hate all of Ontario.
B: Oh yeah…Me too.
I hate Thunder Bay and Ottawa,
Kitchener, Windsor, and Oshawa,
London sucks,
and the Great Lakes suck,
And Sarnia sucks,
and Turkey Point sucks
I took a trip to Ontario,
To visit Brian Mulroney-
Moosoonee sucks and Beaverton sucks Southhampton sucks and Hull sucks, too
He beat me up
and he stole my pants
and he put me on a tree
Peterborough, Marlborough, Stockton suck, Elk Bay Islands And Uxbridge suck
I went to see the Maple Leafs,
and got hit in the head with a puck
Mississauga sucks and Sterling sucks Port Elgin Sucks and Brighton sucks
I don't even know how they did it, I mean,
I was playing the organ at the time
Ravenhurst sucks and Sudbury sucks and Thunder Bay sucks and
Alan Thicke sucks!
Ontario-o-o-o-oh
Sucks.
(spoken)
A: Yup. Actually you know now that I really think about it, I think I pretty much hate every gosh darn province and territory in our country.
B: Well, except Alberta…
A: Oh yeah, I love Alberta!
B: It's very nice, lots of cows and trees and rocks and dirt
A+B: moo moo moo!
but,
I hate Newfoundland cause they talk so weird
And Prince Edward Island is- too small!
Nova Scotia's dumb cause it's the name of a bank
New Brunswick doesn't have a good mall
Quebec is revolting and it makes me mad
Ontario sucks, Ontario sucks
(spoken)
B: And the average population density of Manitoba is 1.9 people per square kilometer…
A: Isn’t that stupid?
Saskatchewan is boring and the people are old
And as for the territories: they’re too cold!
And the only really good thing about the province of British Columbia is that it's right next to us;
Cause Alberta--
Doesn’t suck;
but Calgary does.
It sucks that The Arrogant Worms think Hull is in Ontario... it's across the Ottawa River in Quebec. :)
ReplyDeleteLOL I hadn't heard that song forever! Awesome!
ReplyDeletePeter
OMFG, we have to introduce redsock and LG to The Worms, Frantics and The Vestibules (ne' Radio Free Vestibule) post haste!
ReplyDeleteThe Frantics had views on Edmonton, too, to be fair...
:)
From one of the greatest movies ever made:
ReplyDeleteTimes have changed
Our kids are kids are getting worse
They won't obey their parents
They just want to fart and curse!
Should we blame the government?
Or blame society?
Or should we blame the images on TV?
No, blame Canada
Blame Canada
With all their beady little eyes
And flappin heads so full of lies
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
We need to form a full assault
It's Canada's fault!
Don't blame me
For my son Stan
He saw the darn cartoon
And now he's off to join the Klan!
And my boy Eric once
Had my picture on his shelf
But now when I see him he tells me to fuck myself!
Well, blame Canada
Blame Canada
It seems that everything's gone wrong
Since Canada came along
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
They're not even a real country anyway
My son could've been a doctor or a lawyer it's true
Instead he burned up like a piggy on a barbecue
Should we blame the matches?
Should we blame the fire?
Or the doctors who allowed him to expire?
Heck no!
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
With all their hockey hubbabaloo
And that bitch Anne Murray too
Blame Canada
Shame on Canada
The smut we must stop
The trash we must smash
Laughter and fun must all be undone
We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before someone thinks of blaming uuuuuuuuuuuus